Dalai Lama & Howard C. Cutler ⋅ The Art Of Happiness [1998]

HONESTY AS AN ANTIDOTE TO LOW SELF-ESTEEM OR INFLATED SELF-CONFIDENCE

"Low self-confidence inhibits our efforts to ove ahead, to meet challenges, and even to take some risks when necessary in the pursuit of our objectives. (...)

Those who suffer from an exaggerated sense of their own abilities and accomplishments are continuously subject to frustration, disappointment, and rage when reality intrudes and the world doesn't validate their idealized view of themselves. (...)

'One sense of self, or 'ego', is concerned only with the fulfillment of one's self-interest, one's selfish desires, with complete disregard for the well-being of others. The other type of ego or sense of self is based on a genuine concern for others, and the desire to be of service. In order to fulfill that wish to be service, one needs a strong sense of self, and a sense of self-confidence. This kind of self-confidence is the kind that leads to positive consequences.' (...)

I think perhaps honesty and self-confidence are closely linked. (...) 'The more honest you are, the more open, the less fear you will have, because there's no anxiety about being exposed or revealed to others. So, I think that the more honest you are, the more self-confident you will be.'

I think that, generally, being honest with oneself and others about what you are or are not capable of doing can counteract that feeling of lack of self-confidence."

© Ashley Pelletier 'Untitled Self'

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